Few know from what origin comes forth
conjugial love. They who think from the world believe that it comes forth
from nature; but they who think from heaven believe that it comes forth from the Divine in heaven.
Love truly conjugial is the union of two
minds, which is a spiritual union; and all spiritual union descends from
heaven. From this it is that love truly conjugial is from heaven, and that
its first being is from the marriage of good and truth there. The marriage
of good and truth in heaven is from the Lord; wherefore in the Word the Lord
is called the "Bridegroom" and "Husband," while heaven and the church are
called the "bride" and "wife;" and therefore heaven is compared to a
marriage.
From all this it is evident that love truly
conjugial is the union of two persons in respect to their interiors, which
belong to the thought and the will, thus to truth and good; for truth
belongs to the thought, and good to the will. For one who is in love truly
conjugial loves what the other thinks and what the other wills; thus he also
loves to think as the other does, and he loves to will as the other does;
consequently to be united to the other, and to become as one man. This is
what is meant by the Lord's words in Matthew:
"And they twain shall be one flesh, therefore they are no more twain, but
one flesh" (Matt. 19:4-6; Gen. 2:24).
The delight of love truly conjugial is an
internal delight, because it belongs to the minds, and is also an external
delight from this, which belongs to the bodies. But the delight of love not
truly conjugial is only an external delight without an internal one, and
such a delight belongs to the bodies and not to the minds. But this delight
is earthly, being almost like that of animals, and therefore in time
perishes; whereas the first-mentioned delight is heavenly, as that of men
should be, and therefore is permanent.
No one can know what love truly conjugial
is, and what is the nature of its delight, except one who is in the good of
love and in the truths of faith from the Lord; because, as has been said,
love truly conjugial is from heaven, and is from the marriage of good and
truth there.
From the marriage of good and truth in
heaven and in the church we can learn what must be the nature of marriages
on earth, namely, that they must be between two, one husband and one wife,
and that love truly conjugial is never possible if there are a number of
wives to one husband.
That which is done from love truly conjugial
is done from freedom on both sides, because all freedom is from love, and
both have freedom when one loves that which the other thinks and that which
the other wills. From this it is that the wish to command in marriages
destroys genuine love, for it takes away its freedom, thus also its delight.
The delight of commanding, which follows in its place, brings forth
disagreements, and sets the minds at enmity, and causes evils to take root
according to the nature of the domination on the one side, and the nature of
the servitude on the other.
From all this it can be seen that marriages
are holy, and that to injure them is to injure that which is holy;
consequently that adulteries are profane; for as the delight of conjugial
love descends from heaven, so the delight of adultery ascends from hell.
Therefore those who take delight in
adulteries can no longer receive any good and truth from heaven. From this
it is that those who have taken delight in adulteries, afterward make light
of and also at heart deny the things of the church and of heaven. The reason
of this is that the love of adultery is from the marriage of evil and
falsity, which is the infernal marriage.
(Continuation respecting THE DOCTRINE OF CHARITY −
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